Wasn't meant to look like a poem.

I can’t sleep, and here’s why:

I thought that I was going to sleep
To prepare for my day ahead
When I started crying into my pillow
Thinking “I wish that I was dead”
I know they think I’m worthless
That the future holds nothing for me
And sometimes I think they’re right
So now I can not sleep.

I wish to only slew my inner thoughts that I will not speak
Because “Nothing bothers me”
I remain calm at all times on the outside
And I try not to raise an eye in times of urgency

But the truth is that I’m weak inside
My steady grin is just a mask
It hides my insecurities and flaws I choose to hide
I constantly watch the clock change time
Worrying constantly about what the future holds for me
Where will I be living in by the time I’m 25?
What will my love think, should I happen to fail?

But I stand for what I’m certain of
I’m relentless in my pursuits and I don’t easily give up
I get things done to prove people wrong and throw it in their face
I do as I say and say as I do
I’m a man of my word
But I still feel like I lost

So now I wipe my nose and eyes, and drift to sleep.


Don’t get me wrong… I’ll still take a bat to you if you cross me. I’m no bitch.